Candy, Candy Canes, Candy Corns, & Syrup

Last night, I attempted to create my own cookie recipe. I snagged a big acai protein shake at the gym so I could “have dinner” while I excitedly shopped the grocery store for yummy ingredients. I had grandiose plans to use this spectacularly delicious recipe to kick off a great giveaway on my blog, one that acknowledges a really great cause. I assembled all the ingredients, and enlisted my baker-extraordinaire sister to be my sous-chef. I was excited.

…..and then I attempted to bake.

Um, healthy ingredient substitutions may work well when cooking…but in baking? This is just not always true.

The batter was runny, but pretty tasty. I eagerly sat on the floor in front of the lit oven (for real) to watch my creation unfold. The final cookies didn’t totally spread out into one biiiiiig cookie (a normal occurrence for me), and they didn’t burn, wahoooo!

Buuuut, hold yo’ horses. They felt like sponges, and tasted like a mouthful of whole wheat. Barf.

I got totally down on myself….I don’t feel well, I am tired, I had a crappy day, I wasted my night and my money, my baking skillz are non-existent, I don’t have any delicious cookies to eat, I wish I had my own kitchen again, I suck at life. You know, stuff like that.

So I needed a reminder.

“Get ahold of yourself, self. Here are some things that make you happy right now:”

Snow dogs.

Don’t even ask how many pictures (and treats) this took. It may be considered animal cruelty.

This trailer. 

Any other Summer Heights High fans out there? One of the most genius shows, ever. Netflix. Like, now.

My own little Charlie Brown Christmas tree that I hauled out of one of my many storage boxes marked “XMAS.” It’s hard to have all of my baller Christmas decorations boxed up in my parents garage…hoping by this time next year I will be deckin’ the halls of my own place again. For now, this makes me smile. Especially my new sparkly Anthropologie armadillo.

BIC Bands! Oh. Mah gosh. After reading about these babies soooo many times, I finally decided to try them out. Ever want to see what I look like after two sweaty hours of BodyCombat & BodyFlow? Sure. Of course you do.

I was afraid the sparkly ones (which I am obviously obsessed with, given my obsession for all-things-sparkle-and-glitter) may shed, but the shimmer is in fact part of the material the band is made of. Not only did I not trail glittery goodness all over my gym, much to all the meatheads’ chagrin, I’m sure, but it also kept my wayward hair out of my face. Didn’t budge. For two hours. And they are washable. I will take 72 more, please.

The bottom of my newest Lululemon shopping-bag-turned-lunch-bag.

Maybe I need to take a queue from Buddy here and nix those “healthy” recipe subs for big ol’ helpings of tasty, decadent ingredients. Because, you know what? It is Christmastime. And I do love me some sugar.

And….so what if I am not a wonderful baker and recipe creator? That’s why other talented bakers out there make recipes….for me to follow! I will try again tonight, and when all else fails, I will say hello to Betty Crocker’s Inside-Out Chocolate Chip cookies. Because they. Are. Awesome. Every time. No excessive guesstimates, brain power, or letdowns required.

Keep your fingers crossed for Adventures in Cookie Baking Part II!!!

(This post hereby fills your quota for awkward, goober pictures of Sam for the day.)

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *